darth_stitch: (Snarry Art by Brevisse)
[personal profile] darth_stitch
Editing and proofreading our quarterly calendar of events is driving me bananas.

Therefore, I'm going to mess around a bit with this bit dialogue-writing that got out of hand. Very much out of hand. Consider this backstory for "The Shameless Bad Ficlet," set before our little Arthur had his time travelling adventure.

ETA: I'm going to welcome [livejournal.com profile] vileseagulls to the Twilight Zone that is my brain. Heh. She is now officially one of my Muses. The Muse whose job it is to set loose all my Plot Tiggers and drive me stark raving nutters, that is. Hee.

But I wuv you anyway, Frances! *waves*



On Sense and Sensibility

Sometimes, I think that I really shouldn’t have introduced Ron to the wonders of Muggle cinema.

Of course, he understood that movies were fictional and a form of theatrical entertainment. It was explaining about special effects that seriously threatened my sanity. How do you manage to explain to a wizard how Muggles did “movie magic” without actually casting any spells? How do you tell him about CGI and blue-screen and all those throwaway words they use whenever they do one of those “movie-in-the-making” specials on the telly?

Somehow, I managed to figure that out without making Ron’s eyes glaze over in total incomprehension the way he does when I try to explain why his potion came out wrong or why he can’t figure out that particular charm or spell.

I suppose it was worth it to see him gleefully go over our collection of movies on video – between myself and Mr. Weasley, we managed to set up a TV and VCR at the Burrow. Harry was surprised at me actually – he half expected me to be going on and on about our summer homework instead of “rotting away our brains at the telly.” He didn’t complain about it though – he’d never really been inside a movie theater (like the Dursleys would actually take him to one?) and he hardly got to watch anything on the telly too. I rather thought he’d enjoy this whole thing too.

Of course, we went through Dad’s collection of all those Hollywood action movies like "Indiana Jones" and "Die Hard" - the look on Harry’s face every time Alan Rickman entered a scene was rather...interesting. Which explained why I decided to pick "Sense and Sensibility" when Ron finally ran out of action movies to watch.

And as luck would have had it, we were watching that movie when Harry finally decided to come out of the closet to us, so to speak.

Actually, Ginny and I had our suspicions for quite a long time now. We didn’t want to confront Harry with it though – we wanted him to tell us himself in his own time. And it went without saying that we didn’t dare mention this to Ron. I love that big, redheaded goof with all my heart but there are times when his tongue gets away from his brain. Honestly!

“The gene pool is doomed,” Ginny told me that day, heaving a great big sigh.

The words were funny; the sigh sounded just a bit too sad. “I thought you were over your crush on Harry, Ginny.”

Ginny smiled. It was a bit wistful but I’d been in her shoes. Harry was a very easy person to fall in love with and that wasn’t because of that Boy Who Lived nonsense either. “I was over the crush ages ago. Still - Harry is cute.”

I giggled. “Not like he’d believe that.” It was true, really. Harry looks in the mirror and sees messy hair, an ugly scar and equally ugly glasses. The rest of us see this rather dashing fellow with gorgeous green eyes and believe me, I’ve heard many of the girls express the desire to run their fingers through that messy tangle of silky black hair more than once.

Of course, I’m rather partial to redheads myself but I understand the attraction. No harm in a girl looking after all, right?

Ginny joined me in the laughter. “That’s part of his charm. Can you imagine the hordes of girls wailing when they find out he’s batting for the other team?”

I snickered. “Such is life. If they’re not taken, they’re gay.”

“Oh woe is us.” She put a hand to her forehead, sighing melodramatically.

So here we were, enjoying the movie – Ginny and I were throwing popcorn at the screen every time Kate Winslet’s Marianne showed up (honestly, how stupidly blind in love can you be?) and I was again noting Harry’s interesting reactions every time Alan Rickman’s Colonel Brandon came onscreen. Marianne was still being foolishly besotted with that cad Willoughby when Harry finally made his announcement to us:

“I’m gay.”

It was Ron who surprised us all. “It’s about bloody time you ‘fessed up, mate.”

We all stared at him – I’m sure we probably looked all ridiculous with our mouths agape like that. Ron, impossible prat that he is, just raised a brow. “What? I’m not dense, you know.”

“Who are you and what have you done with Ron Weasley?” I wanted to know, I was just so floored!

“You’re taking this all rather well,” Harry muttered.

“Look Harry, you’re my best mate, y’know?” Ron said. “If you’re queer, you’re queer - whatever makes you happy. Just as long as you’re not secretly in love with me -“

Harry laughed. “Wanker.”

“And he has such a high opinion of himself,” Ginny rolled her eyes.

“Oi!” Ron protested. “I’m not so bad-looking, am I? I’m just not bent that way, is all I’m saying.”

“All right, all right,” Harry said, still laughing. “No, Ron, I’m not secretly lusting after you. You’re not my type.”

“Oh good,” I said then, crossing my arms, although I wasn’t able to keep the amusement out of my voice. “You’ll have me to answer to if you did.”

Harry rolled his eyes. “Far be it for me to step in on True Love - which was bloody obvious since we developed hormones.”

I blushed. Well, he had a point – it did take Ron and I long enough to realize what we felt for each other. I stole a look at my boyfriend whose ears were rather suspiciously red too.

“Seriously, Harry,” Ginny said, throwing an arm over his shoulders and hugging him. “It’s all right with us, you know?”

“Amen to that,” I put in. Then, I had a truly evil idea. “So if Ron’s not your type, Harry-my-lad, who is?”

He blushed but I caught how he stole a glance at the screen, which was currently showing Colonel Brandon. I did understand Harry's interest in Mr. Rickman's extraordinary skill in acting...among other things, that is.

“Just please don’t tell me it runs to blonde, sneering and sexy,” Ginny pleaded. “I mean, Draco Malfoy may be cute but he’s a bloody berk, you know?”

Oh dear. I braced myself for my boyfriend’s inevitable reaction.

“Gin!” Ron was outraged. “How can you say Malfoy is ‘cute’?”

Ginny was unfazed. “Malfoy IS a wanker and a half. But he’s a cute wanker and a half. Unfortunately. That’s all I’m saying.”

“She has a point,” I said reasonably, putting on my best innocent look.

“HERMIONE!” Ron all but wailed.

“But I prefer redheads and freckles anyway,” I continued angelically. Payback, my love, is sweet.

Harry was all but howling with laughter.

“But we’re getting off the subject,” Ginny, whose capacity for absolute evil exceeds the twins’. “The subject being who Harry’s type is.”

"Not redheads and freckles," Harry chortled.

Ron heaved a sigh of relief and got twhapped by an expertly aimed pillow from his best friend.

"Not silvery blonde and a wanker either," Ginny confirmed.

"He is cute though..." Harry mused.

"HARRY!" Ron was now pure Weasley outrage. "You're as bad as Ginny here!"

"He's a wanker and a bloody prat," Harry assured him. "But it's like what Gin says - he's a cute wanker and bloody prat. We're just looking - is all m'saying. No harm in that, right?"

"Mm-hmm," Ginny agreed.

"Nice arse too," I chimed in, thoroughly enjoying the outraged look on my boyfriend’s face. “Don’t worry, love – yours is better.”

"Nah, Snape's is much better." Harry asserted.

There was dead silence.

And then:

"SNAPE?!" Ron choked.

I arched a brow. "Harry James Potter, since when have you been checking out Snape's arse?"

“What? It’s a fine arse,” He looked innocent. Angelic, even. Harry was very good at that. “When it’s not hidden by all those flowing robes, as good as they look on him.”

“All right, that’s it,” Ron decided. He pointed his wand at Harry. “Who are you and what have you done with my mate Harry?”

“Well....Snape is rather dashing when he cleans up.” Leave it to Ginny to add even more fuel to the fire, looking rather wicked. “The Slytherin girls weren’t the only ones sighing over him last Yule ball.”

“Gin!” Ron howled. “First Draco and now Snape?”

“And there’s that voice….” Ginny sighed dreamily. “Even when he’s just saying that he’s taking points away from Gryffindor, I want to swoon away.”

Ginny Weasley, you are an evil, evil woman, I thought, looking at Harry’s face. It said everything.

“True,” Harry murmured. “Not fair, isn’t it?”

“He’s a PRAT!” Ron squawked. “Am I the only sane person in this group?”

“We’re not denying he’s a prat, Ron,” Harry said levelly. “And yes, he does clean up fine and his voice has me in knots every time I hear it. And he’s a snarky, grouchy, unpredictable bastard. But I love the snarky, grouchy, unpredictable bastard, so there.”

“You’re barking,” Ron stared at him as if he'd grown a second head. Ginny and I looked at each other...and well, why was it that neither of us seemed really surprised about Harry and Snape?

“Yeah. Hopelessly, utterly, completely in love. That’s me. Pathetic, isn’t it?” The admission was calm, matter-of-fact and typically Harry. The misery in his eyes was typically Harry too.

“Maybe it’s a spell,” My boyfriend was desperately clutching at his rapidly sinking ship on the River Denial. “I bet Malfoy hexed you – the bloody git would love to humiliate you like this.”

“It’s not a spell,” Harry said quietly. “It’s not a hex. I’ve been working with Snape for quite some time now...he’s not just this greasy git, all right?” He looked away. “He’s more. He’s far more than we ever thought he was. And no one ever sees....”

“Oh Harry,” This from Ginny, whose eyes were suspiciously bright.

“It’s a ridiculous teenage crush, that’s what it is,” Ron decided. “We’ll laugh about it when we’re old and gray. Use the information to blackmail you, even.”

“Ha-bloody-ha,” Harry said sourly. “I wish it was just a crush, you know? Then maybe it would’ve gone away right about the next time I bollicksed up in Potions class and he’d dressed me down with the Slytherins snickering AGAIN!”

“Harry,” I began tentatively, not wanting to say it but knowing that this had to be done anyway. “He’s a professor and Hogwarts does not allow -“

“Eww…. Hermione, love, don’t even go there!” Ron looked green.

Harry rolled his eyes. “I’m in love but I haven’t gone completely stupid. And let’s just be clear – he doesn’t bloody know, all right? In fact, he’d probably think I was off my rocker too.”

“Nice to know that you haven’t completely lost your marbles, mate,” Ron put in. I elbowed him sharply, which earned me an aggrieved “Oi!” from my hopeless boyfriend.

Harry sighed. “Let’s just watch the movie, all right?” He determinedly turned his attention to the telly, after grabbing a rather large handful of popcorn. Colonel Brandon was once again onscreen, having a rather serious chat with Elinor. “That Alan Rickman bloke’s rather good, isn’t he?”

“Lovely voice,” Ginny chimed in, accepting Harry’s decision to change the subject. “Absolutely dashing, too.”

“I don’t know,” Ron frowned. “He looks a bit too familiar to me…”

“Wish Marianne would dump that Willoughby prat and get together with the Colonel instead,” Harry grumbled.

“He’s too old for her, isn’t he?” Ron asked.

“Does it really matter, when he’s the one who really loves her?” Ginny pointed out.

“I rather think,” I said carefully, “that Marianne still has a bit of growing up to do before she’ll finally get together with the good Colonel.”

“I suppose she does at that,” Harry agreed. “Meet him on equal ground, right? So he doesn’t think of her as just a child anymore.”

I nodded.

“But she is going to end up with him, isn’t she? Never read the book, you know.”

“Do you really want me to spoil the ending, Harry?”

“Happily ever after,” Harry decided. He grabbed another handful of popcorn. “That’s the way it should end.”

“Best ending there is,” Ginny said.

We continued watching the movie in silence for a few minutes. And then:

“Just a few more months,” Harry said softly. “Maybe a year.”

“Yes.” There was nothing more any of us could say.

At least, that was what I thought.

“I’m going to pretend that you lot weren’t really talking about Harry and Snape right now,” Ron said. “Honestly, I’m really not as dense as you think I am!”

We all laughed and Harry hit him again with the pillow. Ron didn’t complain very much when I offered to kiss it better, never mind Ginny making gagging noises in the background. Harry just smiled at us indulgently, with this wistful light in his eyes.

I love Ron, I really do.

I only hope Harry will finally be just as lucky.

- end -

Date: 2004-06-09 08:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snapes-pet.livejournal.com
That filled me with warm fuzzies. I love how AR was entangled into the fic and Ron almost placing the face. lol I'm starting to fall head over heels with these stories.

That reminds me... Did you get the trivia I sent you before you went on vacation?

Date: 2004-06-09 08:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Hee. Hey, Ron really ISN'T all that dense you know.

More trivia? Really? I shall go and check! Thanks ever so!

Date: 2004-06-09 09:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] snapes-pet.livejournal.com
Let me know if you need me to resend it. I didn't know if you'd want the answer or not so I left it off. I'll send that if you want it. :)

Date: 2004-06-09 08:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sevter.livejournal.com
*goes glassy-eyes*

mmmmm...the voice...the arse...*swoons*

Date: 2004-06-09 08:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
*whips out her fan and fans [livejournal.com profile] sevter *

Better, hon?

Date: 2004-06-09 10:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] psycho-tabby.livejournal.com
oh that was just beautiful
*great big grin*
Loved the different PoV,
just wonderful!
Thank you!

Date: 2004-06-10 03:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Hee! Glad you liked it.

I was trying to decide whose POV was it going to be - what do you know, Hermione won the toss. :D

Date: 2004-06-09 10:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lysambre.livejournal.com
A very nice story, interesting twist to the "coming out of the closet" plot :)))

Date: 2004-06-10 08:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Thanks. Coming out while watching Sense and Sensibility? Only Harry....

Date: 2004-06-09 11:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vileseagulls.livejournal.com
Sure, sure. Blame it allllll on me.

Just because I caused it doesn't mean it's all my fault!

*invades your brain and passes out fresh fudge*


(Oh, and you know I love this. Could I have any other response to your writing than 'awwwww!'?)

Date: 2004-06-09 12:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Oh no. The rest of my Muses can quite happily share in the blame.

Especially the teenaged Sev n' Harry ones.

Oh dear. I have a sinking feeling that I'm not going to get any of that fudge....

Date: 2004-06-09 06:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vileseagulls.livejournal.com
Have charmed it! Look, yummy fudge!

Date: 2004-06-10 02:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! Yummy fudge!!!

Date: 2004-06-09 12:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tayefeth.livejournal.com
I'm reading this entirely out of context, but I enjoyed it greatly. The dialogue works, although I don't know anyone who's come out quite that baldly, even to good friends. You might want to find a way to set the flashback off from the rest of it, but otherwise... Well, I'll happily sit in the corner and join Harry and Ginny in drooling over Rickman's Colonel Brandon.

Date: 2004-06-09 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] vileseagulls.livejournal.com
although I don't know anyone who's come out quite that baldly

*waves* I did. Dad's still pretending he never heard me.

*sits on Stitch*

Date: 2004-06-10 02:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Yeah. Alan Rickman. Rowrrrrrr...... You can imagine the time I have with my Ginny and Harry muses when I watch any movie with Alan Rickman in it.

Dogma. Hee.

And oh yeah, the Harry Potter movies....especially the dueling scene. Yum.

*passes the popcorn bowl*

Date: 2004-06-10 04:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tayefeth.livejournal.com
I want to listen in when your Harry and Ginny watch Love Actually.

Date: 2004-06-09 01:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kissmyassterisk.livejournal.com
Beautiful, darling. That was artfully done, with a cleverly different POV, and a cute little bit about everyone already knowing. I liked the mentions of AR, and how Ron almost knows who he is, but can't quite place him.
I think I like Colonel Brandon nearly as much as Snape, because our dear AR can pull off period dress, UN-like SOME-body *cough*HughGrant*cough* we know, who nearly ruined that movie for me. I liked Hugh better in Four Weddings and a Funeral(<--that's a cute movie).
Wow, how much am I rambling? Anyway, lovely, and I hope there's more interesting stuff like this for me to search out... Heh...

Date: 2004-06-10 02:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
*snort*

Yep. I have to agree with you about that Hugh Grant fellow. Having never read the novel, I was already rooting for Emma Thompson's Elinor to snag Colonel Brandon instead of waiting around for "Edward."

Hey, if Marianne can't appreciate a good thing when she sees it....

And as for Ron - like I said, he's not really dense. But man, does he LOVE sailing in the River Denial....

Date: 2004-06-09 06:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] juice817.livejournal.com
Too sweet! I always always love your ficlets, Stitch. Welcome back, btw... ;)

Date: 2004-06-10 03:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
And very glad to be back too! Whee! *hugs*

Date: 2004-06-09 10:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cydah.livejournal.com
I love and love and love you. ^_^ Glad you didn't make Ron too too dense. And how Ginny and Herimone is aiding Harry.

Date: 2004-06-10 08:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
I wuv you too! Hee.

Seriously, Ron gets the short shrift way too much - even from me. *snerk* And OF COURSE, Hermione and Ginny would be supportive of our Harry! Especially when it comes to Snape-wrangling. *snicker*

Date: 2004-06-10 12:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] murasaki99.livejournal.com
Oooo, I like this very much! Very nicely done and it feels very in-character for all concerned. You have a delicate touch with the dialog and I really like that. Thanks a bunch for the new story!

Date: 2004-06-10 03:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] darth-stitch.livejournal.com
Hee. Glad you liked this bit of conversation that just went out of control on me. Looking at the original - which featured, of all things, a nearly Mary Sue-like O.C. - cutting her out was much much better. :D

Re: the Stine

Date: 2004-06-12 01:46 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Hiya,

'Stine here. I'm sorry missed you when I went there last week (i believe it was the day of the openeing of HP3). I left you note on your computer did you get it?

Good news! I'll probably be back (for around 5 months), to help out with Ms. Clottie's Theater Festival. Oh, it looks like I'll be going up the the 3rd floor to bug you everyday.

Kristine

Date: 2004-06-17 07:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] toxikon.livejournal.com
Hello, my friend recced this fic and I enjoyed it a lot! Just thought I'd er... mention that :) Very well written and interesting how it mixes RL although that spun me out a bit :p I loved it :)

Date: 2006-04-21 02:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hasaidreamer.livejournal.com
love it!! My favourite line: “I’m going to pretend that you lot weren’t really talking about Harry and Snape right now,” Ron said. “Honestly, I’m really not as dense as you think I am!”

:P

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