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darth_stitchCasting Call Shenanigans
DISCLAIMER: If I owned them, I think we'd have had the whole Kono problem fixed by now and Danny and Steve would be planning their wedding, so.... yeah..... we're SOL right there.
***
Danny Williams’ life since coming to Hawaii had become a Michael Bay movie.
At the very least, it strongly resembled one of those cheesy cop action shows that he loved as a kid, despite the fact that there was a lot of laughable handwaving to police procedures in real life. With a crazy-ass Navy SEAL as the task force commander and immunity and means from the Governor, the amount of crazy Danny had to put up with was fucking huge.
Then again, Danny was in love with the idiot and he was sorely afraid that the crazy had rubbed off. He just didn’t want to admit it out loud.
And then, they found out that Hollywood wanted to create a TV series based on them.
“OMGWTFHBBQ,” was Spooky’s succinct reply upon hearing the news. Sometimes, Spooky forgot that Netspeak and the Language of Squee worked best in a chatroom but she had a way of making it work in actual spoken language.
“You know,” Danny said reflectively. “I actually understood that one.”
“This is so cool!” Kono said excitedly. “Hey, as long as they got someone hot to play me, I’m game!” And then, she looked speculatively at her cousin.
Chin held up a warning hand, “For the nth time, ‘cuz, I do not look like the guy from Lost!”
“You know,” Spooky said reflectively. “Casting people who could play us would be plenty interesting. My vote would be that Battlestar Galactica chick for Kono. Boomer, baby!”
“AWESOME!” Kono cheered. “And you could be that girl from Sucker Punch – without the blonde hair.”
“I would like to state for the record that this conversation is scaring me very, very much,” Danny said.
“I think maybe it’s time for me to pick up Michael,” Steve decided, not liking the speculative look Kono was giving him.
“Hey! I thought Navy SEALs aren’t supposed to wuss out, McGarrett!”
“It’s called a ‘strategic withdrawal’, Danno,” Steve deadpanned.
Kono grinned evilly. “You know, I heard that they confirmed who they’re gonna cast as Bossman over here.”
Spooky gasped. Naturally, she caught on right away. “No fucking way!”
“Yep – it’s the guy from Moonlight!” Kono cackled.
Steve groaned.
"Babe, look at it this way," Danny tried to console him. "At least he's not a sparkly vampire?"
"Bossman, he really needs the job - I mean, two failed series? Writers' Strike? He needs the break," Kono explained.
"The fact that you were part of the 'Bring Back Moonlight' campaign has nothing to do with it, right, Kono?" Spooky observed wryly.
"Uh-huh and I saw your 'Team Mick' t-shirt already so deal, Spooky," Kono snarked back.
Spooky had the grace to look sheepish. "You win this round."
Chin tried to stop his laughter, he really did but it was a hopeless cause.
“You know, it kind of makes sense,” Danny said thoughtfully. “That Moonlight guy spends an awful lot of time going around shirtless. They’d probably write that into this new show too, considering we get a lot of shirtless Steve around here….”
“Hey! Objectify much?!” Steve protested.
“They’ll probably have us girls in bikinis half the time, boss,” Kono said comfortingly. “Equal-opportunity ogling and objectifying right here!”
Danny smirked. “You just make it too easy, babe.”
“All right, all right,” Steve said, raising his hands in surrender. “You guys have any idea who’ll be playing Danny?”
If it were possible, Kono’s grin grew even more evil. “How good’s your knowledge of late 90s football-themed movies, Bossman?”
Steve blinked. “I remember the one with the Dawson’s Creek guy and –“
“If you mention the chick with the whipped cream sundae, I will so hurt you, SEAL or not,” Spooky promised fervently.
Danny snorted. “Spooks, every guy remembers the chick with the whipped cream sundae. And seriously, Steven, you actually watched Dawson’s Creek?”
Steve shrugged. “It was like osmosis. I didn’t have to watch it to know about it, Danno. So, what’s the deal with Varsity Blues and the actor they’re getting to play Danno here?”
Kono snickered. “One word, guys – Tweeder.”
Everyone stared at Danny who stared back and said, for once completely clueless, “What?!”
And then Steve blushed.
Spooky was flailing. “Oh GOD. That scene with the nekkid and the cowboy hat…. and the nekkid….”
Chin had buried his face in his hands. “Honestly, it’s like watching these people regress back to adolescence every day…”
“Damn it, Spooky, don’t start in with…. with… “ Steve was at a loss for words and still blushing very, very prettily.
“…Scotty Caan’s perfectly pert ass?” Kono said angelically and then gave Danny a significant once-over.
“HEY!” Steve said in outrage.
Danny gulped. “I suddenly feel very, very naked at this point.”
Steve slanted a very predatory grin in Danny’s direction. “Would it help very much if I admit that the reason I watched Varsity Blues was for Tweeder?”
The girls raised their hands. “Same here!”
Danny found himself grinning back. “Nursing a big ol’ man-crush back then, Steven?”
And then Danny found himself being firmly guided outside of HQ, much to the disappointment of the girls (and Chin’s very obvious relief). “Maybe we ought to take that discussion somewhere more private, Danno.”
-end-
A/N: I know the latest episodes have harshed a lot of the squee for this show. I'm writing fix-it fic and AU fic and crackfic to take away the pain.
lamardeuse and leupagus - this is for you. 
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Date: 2011-10-04 08:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-04 08:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-04 11:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-04 11:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-10-05 04:24 pm (UTC)is it a Mary Sue character? help! :-)
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Date: 2011-10-05 04:46 pm (UTC)I hope she's not a Mary Sue. If she's giving you that vibe, then I suck.... so much. LMAO.
She IS an OC but I originally got her in as a reaction to the whole "Hey, let's put in another girl to be the female Steve McGarrett." So I made up Spooky (because I didn't know how they were going to handle the Lori Wilson character) and then realized she was leaning towards more as a foil for Kono. Um.... maybe a Goth girl Danny to Kono's Steve? She's still in development, anyway.
I promise that Spooky will not be anyone's love interest! XD
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Date: 2011-10-05 04:50 pm (UTC)(sorry about the Mary Sue thing - but I was really at a loss)
:-)
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Date: 2011-10-05 04:55 pm (UTC)It's just that "Mary Sue" is a fatal tripwire for most fan fic writers (we all have those moments, y/y?). I pretty much learned to spot those miles away and just chortle over 'em.
Right now, I like the direction Spooky seems to be going in and that Kono gets another foil, other than her cousin Chin. I blame the LOTR crossover mishmash I'm still working on and speaking of which, I really got to finish that thing....