![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
darth_stitchOkay, just to make things clear - the lovely
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
iulia_linnea has a 20 Random Facts Fest ongoing and this wee bit of nonsense IS inspired by that fest but is not yet officially submitted as an entry to the fest. Although iulia_linnea was nice enough to express interest in the thing in my last LJ post and has encouraged me to go ahead and write it. Hee. I'm just putting it up here on my LJ first as a draft of sorts but I won't cross post it on other comms such as
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif){kind=small}
snape_potter or suchlike yet - I'll ETA this entry if I'm officially accepted in the Fest and THEN I'll see if I can cross post to the fic comms as per usual.Anyway, I wouldn't have done this without being inspired by
iulia_linnea and everyone else participating in her fest. I originally spun this bit of silliness for some of my fellow Potterverse-lovin' officemates, much to their combined horror, amusement and sheer entertainment and some of 'em even contributed to the madness. Heh.ETA: YAY!! I'm in the Fest! *dances with joy*
20 Random Facts About The "Wedding" of Harry Potter& Severus Snape (AU - Because a Certain Ye Dafte Olde Coote Is Alive and Happily Meddling)
1. When Harry Potter reached his 21st birthday, he received a pair of platinum wedding rings.
2. The rings were made for every generation of the Potter family, a legacy handed down 300 years ago by a well-meaning (if rather daft) "fairy godmother," so that every Potter would be able to find and wed their "one true love" and live happily ever after. The idea of course, being that the said Potter's "one true love" would be the only person who could wear that ring.
3. The "fairy godmother's" name was Ephigenia Philomena Apollonia Dumbledore.
4. To Harry, THAT explained everything.
5. Harry was prepared to forget the whole ridiculous thing because, really, it wasn't as if he had ANYONE to give the rings to. And no, he DID NOT harbor the idea of going down on one knee, holding out the ring in his trembling hands and proposing marriage to a Certain Dark-Haired, Sarcastic, Sharp-tongued, Temperamental, Dead Sexy Potions Master. REALLY. NO. He didn't think about that at all.
6. Unfortunately, Rita Skeeter somehow got wind of the news and promptly had her story published in an Extra Special Edition of The Daily Prophet, prompting every eligible witch in Britain (and a few wizards) into a frothing matrimonial frenzy.
7. Draco Malfoy was the first to pounce upon Harry and promptly got hexed when he tried searching for the ring in the most inappropriate place possible on Harry's person.
8. Albus Dumbledore, in the grand tradition of his distant fairy ancestor, proposed that the ring meant for the next Mrs. Potter (or Mr. Potter?) be put on display in the Lesser Hall at Hogwarts so that the "ravening hordes of Pottermaniacs" (as elegantly put by Severus Snape) could try their luck and leave Harry in peace.
9. Harry had already prudently hid out in the last place anyone would think to look for him (at least, for anyone who'd memorized the "Quick Potter Facts" article in Witch Weekly and knew how close Harry was to the Weasleys and the Grangers) - in the dungeons with now fellow professor Severus Snape.
10. Harry was willing to take weeks of Snape-snarking over the "slobbering Pottermaniac hordes."
11. In the meantime, Snape was having a grand time amusing himself at Harry's expense over his latest predicament - there were just too many pithy comments and jokes to be made about a certain Savior of the Wizarding World (especially since Snape HAD helped this particular Savior get rid of the late and unlamented Thomas Riddle). He supposed that he should be proud that he'd somehow suceeded in pounding knowledge into the stubborn head of this particular former student, who even managed to return now as a fellow teacher.
12. And no, Snape was NOT doing this simply to get away from the ludicrous mental image he had of Harry Potter in a white wedding gown, which he found oddly... fetching. No, really, he'd never harbored such a ridiculous notion in his life!
13. There was no such thing as "unresolved sexual tension" in the three weeks that Harry spent in Snape's dungeons.
14. Snape did not react to a sleepy, tousle-haired Harry who regularly met him with his dressing gown open, showing a bare chest, every morning.
15. Harry did not react to the fact that Snape actually owned a pair of Muggle jeans and had a great arse in those jeans.
16. Severus could not explain how he found himself in the Lesser Hall one evening, minutes away from midnight, putting on the Potter wedding ring.
17. The ring fit perfectly on his finger.
18. Harry could not explain why he found himself going to the Lesser Hall, wearing HIS own ring and finding Severus there.
19. The two of them spluttered, made incoherent denials and explanations for a few moments before they finally stopped, stared at each other and then, ended up kissing. Madly. Passionately. It was absolutely mind-blowing and said all the things that needed to be said between them. Or at least, it was a great starting point.
20. Harry Potter and Severus Snape were "wed" in a quiet, simple ceremony held more for formality's sake with just close friends and family attending. Neither of them wore a wedding dress but both looked rather dashing in their respective elegant formal robes. They were neither of them overly sentimental so the vows made were simple and straight to the point but the kiss, as it had in the real wedding, said everything. Living "happily ever after" was a harder task than it looked but both men were more than equal to it.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-12-12 09:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 03:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-12 09:17 pm (UTC)*Applauds* Oh, this was wonderful! I love the "20 Random Facts" structure, but am never able to quite capture the style myself. But you did it perfectly. *
barelyresists asking for an encore*no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 02:07 am (UTC)Good to see you up on LJ again! W00t!
no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 06:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 09:30 am (UTC)Great to see you back!
no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 10:00 am (UTC)4. To Harry, THAT explained everything.
*giggles*
That was perfect. ^^
no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 12:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 01:06 pm (UTC)Where did you get that mood icon? I've never seen anyhing like it.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-14 07:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-14 09:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-16 01:45 am (UTC)As for size, I've never messed with the sizes of the mood icons, I just took them as they were.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-14 09:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 02:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 04:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 05:29 pm (UTC)And Fact #3 *does* explain everything.
no subject
Date: 2006-12-13 11:21 pm (UTC)welcome back!
no subject
Date: 2006-12-14 01:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-12-15 11:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-02-16 10:40 pm (UTC)thanks
tvals01
no subject
Date: 2007-02-22 10:32 am (UTC)