The Ten Commandments of Harry Potter-verse Nicknames

[darth_stitch]

1. For the love of God, DON'T call Severus Snape "Sevvie." Unless you happen to be Sirius Black or any Potterverse character with suicidal tendencies and/or taking the piss, Severus Snape is NOT a Sevvie. Ever.

And not everyone can call Severus Snape, "Sev." Really. Merlin's honest truth. XP What? It's reserved for the Dark Bunny Lord Harry!

2. His name is Harry James Potter. I've checked the books and the Lexicon from side to side and end to end and nowhere does it state that his real name is Harold or Henry. Thou shalt refer to him as Harry and not even by that perfidious nickname "Har." "Harry" is a perfectly serviceable two-syllable name that does not deserve to be reduced to a sound effect.

3. Thou shalt not EVER refer to Draco Malfoy as "Dray." The name Draco means "dragon." From dictionary.com, a dray is a low, heavy cart without sides, used for haulage. It's dragged by a bloody HORSE. Give the little ferret a break or Moaning Myrtle will haunt you for the rest of your days. XP

4. Sirius Black has many nicknames. Thou shalt take your pick from Padfoot, Pads, Snuffles, mangy flea-bitten cur, dogfather, Remus Lupin's shagbunny ... just Don't. Ever. Call. Him. Siri.

5. There is no such person as Remy Lupin. He does not exist. Now if you lot are looking for Moony or Remus Lupin, why he's in Club Denial in Tahiti, with his shagbunny Sirius Black. XP

6. Thou shalt not call Minerva McGonagall "Minnie." She's a cat, not a mouse.

7. By all means, call Voldemort by his old school nickname of "Squiggy." Hey, wikdsushi, greatest of all Dark Ladies, said so! XP

8. And while we're at it, please feel free to call Albus Dumbledore "Albie" or "Dumby" or hey, "Dumbo." He'll probably get a kick out of it, right down to his purple and yellow and fuchsia socks. XP

9. Thou shalt not call Hermione Granger "Hermy" or "'Mione" - I don't care if you're Won Won Weasley and madly in love with her!

10. Thou shalt feel free to use absurd crazy nicknames for the Harry Potter cast if and only if you're doing it for comic relief. Trust me, even "Sevvie" wants to run from his Insane, Cheek-pinching Aunts of Doom. XP

Comments

[iulia_linnea.livejournal.com]

Hee! But I like 'Mione . . . .

[darth-stitch.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

Frankly, it's Hermy that REALLY sets my teeth on edge. XP 'Mione is just less jarring. XP

[iulia_linnea.livejournal.com]

"Hermy" puts me in mind of "hermaphrodite," which is not---in most contexts---a sexy word for me. *g*

[thepinkangel.livejournal.com]

Siri...? I shudder at the though of what Sirius would say to THAT particular little number XP Although I'm sure Dumbledore would be amused by almost any funny nickname someone gives him. ^_^

[reddwarfer.livejournal.com]

I am so much in love with you right now.